I ran across this piece in a Dear Abby column recently and while not surprised I was struck by the content… take a look…

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DEAR ABBY: I, too, am in a "mixed marriage." I'm religious and my husband is an atheist. We agree to disagree on the matter. Religion (or lack of it) is a very personal thing, and however we feel, we owe each other respect for our different views.

 "Coerced" is great for trying to accommodate her husband, but now that they see it didn't work, he should stop pressuring her. She can refrain from going to services, but should consider attending the church's social events. This solution worked well for us. My husband and my church friends get along well.

 Of course, this depends on the nature of the church. Mine happens to be one of the more progressive. It's worth a try. -- KATHRYN IN OTTAWA, CANADA

 DEAR ABBY: I knew my husband was atheist when we married. Our spiritual journeys are different, and we're not going to change each other.

 We agreed I would raise our kids Catholic. I never expect him to be at church with us on Sundays, but on important sacraments (baptism, first communion, confirmation), he is there with the whole family because he realizes these events are important for his kids and me. He has become friendly with some of my clergy and fellow congregants, who accept him for the wonderful person he is.

 Maybe in the future "Coerced" could attend an event like a church spaghetti dinner, something outside of services, and get to know the people her husband spends time with on Sunday. And he could spend a weekend doing a silent hiking retreat with his wife and her friends.

Respecting each other's spiritual path is a first step toward appreciating each other's differences and growing together. -- BLESSED IN OREGON

 DEAR ABBY: "Coerced" is lucky to have a man who attends church and wants her to go, too. She might consider helping in the nursery. That way, she's there with him but doesn't have to listen to the message. Churches are always looking for help so parents can actually attend the service. -- LAURA IN CONNECTICUT

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 Ok, I see a problem here. I am all for relationship evangelism but not “relationship” evangelism. The bible is pretty clear in how it addressed this item of life.

Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 6:14

 Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness?

There was (and is) a reason for this. When two people are put together and have distinctly different, often diametrically opposed faiths there will inevitably be conflict. This conflict will go beyond “how will we raise the children…”

Our faith system is at the root of how we act, who we are and how we live our lives (well, its supposed to be anyway). God, in His infinite wisdom knows that putting two people together who are at opposite ends of the spectrum would lead to marital conflict.

Some people will say – “But if I date them and if we get married maybe I can be the one that leads them to Christ.” Well, you better lead them there first!

Then they will quote something like 1 Corinthians 7:16

For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?

BUT they are taking that out of context. This verse is referring to those who are ALREADY married and one accepts Christ and the other has not.. yet… but that in the staying together in a marriage that is ALREADY established the result may be that the other comes to know Christ.

 It comes as no surprise that the believing spouse is writing to Dear Abby about their non-believing spouse.. but for the ones who knew that going into it, they knew better, so they honestly brought this issue on themselves. God told you that it would happen… so it should come as no surprise. What did you think was going to happen?

 IF you are someone who is currently dating, who is looking for that future husband and wife, it is far and away more advisable to find someone who is of the same faith and who has the same love for God as you do. Don’t try to use “relationship” evangelism if you are dating a non-believer. You will be better served by a future spouse who believes in the Biblical tenants of being a Godly husband or Godly wife and who will strive to BE that for you.

Don’t invite, welcome and embrace potential problems into your future relationship.